Wednesday, 13 July 2011

A Beckham by any normal name would smell as suspicious …

The first one they called Brooklyn.
That’s where they were on vacation when he was conceived, see?
Great idea for others to emulate
As long as they’re not having sex in Upper Langton Matravers or Piddle-on-the-Hill.

The second one they called Romeo
That’s culture, innit, and makes you look well good?
What’s more, it guarantees him a great future
And a series of angry fathers who don’t want him to marry their daughters. Oops.

The third one they called Cruz.
Okay, it’s Spanish, but they’re not Really Madrid people.
And it’s a girl’s name anyway. (Slap in the face for the third boy, eh?)
And only about seventy million trillion others have the same name.

Now they’ve dubbed/daubed their little girl Harper Seven
As you do, as you do, when you’ve lost your book of Baby Names for the Normal.
And little Harper S, with Brooklyn, Romeo and Cruz,
Will call their dolls and teddies Jane and Martin and Julie and Bill
And start a club in the shed called 'How to Get Revenge on Your Parents'.

© Fran Hill

Beckhams name first daughter Harper Seven
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Fran lives in the West Midlands (UK). She teaches English in a local secondary school, writes, performs, blogs, tweets and tries to resist chocolate.

3 comments:

  1. Bwahahaha - excellent poem and spot on. Reminds me of Seinfeld when George came up with the name seven and someone stole it off him.

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  2. Thanks, Gabrielle. Anyway, wasn't Seven a horrid crime film? Why would you DO that?

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