dim sun behind heavy curtain, mist
field sparkles with dew, river Ruairi
rushes to the sea, chimes the wind
moist air traces an oriental smile
On the other side,
talking to the swelled up moon
thousands of bodies washed to shore
people who have little donating food,
t-shirts, nappies to help the trapped
Here I do follow this morning land
as long as allowed – too aware
how precious - and eternal the smiles
© Csilla Toldy
Japan will overcome crisis - IAEA
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Csilla's stories and poetry have appeared in The Black Mountain Review, Southword, Fortnight, Poetry Monthly, and Strictly Writing Award. For more information, visit the website: Csilla Toldy
Hi Csilla,
ReplyDeleteI love the mood of this and the fresh language - "chimes the wind", "swelled up moon". Very poignant.
I found the strange punctuation and capitalisation a little distracting from the simple beauty of this poem.
oops, I posted the comment above before I noticed this was on a poetry publishing blog - sorry, I thought it was your personal blog, having come via a facebook link. Probably not appropriate to give feedback here, so please ignore me.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the kind comment. Punctuation is re-invented. No full stops, commas to move on, dash to pause, capitals to signify change of place. I was trying to use as little as possible to recreate a mental state of meditation.
ReplyDelete